A 40-year-old Pastor and his wife 34 years of age have been married for about
12 years with three kids. The problem is that she does not satisfy me séxually
and this has made me patronise other women for séx. I am a pastor, but in the
last four years, I have had to sleep with two different ladies to satisfy my
séxual urges. My wife’s attitude is bad — she would not cook on time; she is
dirty and never makes any move to ask for séx. She only agrees whenever she
senses that I am angry.
I love her but how do I address this? I want to have her in bed daily
because I have stopped all extra-marital affairs since the year began. I had
already confessed to her and other co-pastors and I was forgiven.
But there are times I want to go back to my old girlfriends due to
loneliness...
What do I do? I have reported her to her family members and my pastors to no avail. What do I do?
What do I do? I have reported her to her family members and my pastors to no avail. What do I do?
- M.I, Ibadan
Reply from Punch's Kemi Ashefon:
Reply from Punch's Kemi Ashefon:
As a pastor, you are supposed to serve as an example in good works which
include taming the flesh. This is an issue you must address physically and
spiritually. If you don’t face your marriage and work things out with your wife,
it can collapse and that will affect your ministry.
Carry your wife along in mapping out the best time for séx because it may
not be convenient for a mother of three children, who also takes care of the
home, to have séx daily. You can be more involved in spiritual activities —
prayers, fasting and a thorough study of the word of God. These should help take
your mind off séx for a period of time.
Lastly, I think your wife also got some things wrong in her walk with God
as a pastor’s wife. The two of you need a re-alignment with God and his
instruction on marriage and séx.
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